picture of bill's head in a jarWhat's In Bill's Head?

Posts for Category Q&A

Good news for people who can’t remember Bill’s Head’s Address

 Posted by Bill on September 12, 2011 at 12:27 pm
Sep 122011
 

Q:

I have a hard time remembering the URL (I don’t even know what that means) “thoughts.wlw3.com” and I can’t even remember to go to “wlw3.com” and click the “Thoughts” link and I’m hopeless with browser bookmarks and RSS is beyond what I can even consider dealing with. Is there an easier way for me to remember how to find this site?

A:

It seems like easy-to-remember URLs and bookmarks and whatnot are becoming obsolete since everyone just searches for everything now anyway, when they can be bothered to leave Facebook, so you could always try that (or just click the Facebook voodoo button over there on the left to get updates sent to Facebook, if you’re that sort of person).

Sadly, though, searching for “bill’s head” gets you a whole bunch of useless crap (if you can remember to use quotes around “bill’s head” when you search, you’ll do much better). Plus some guy calling himself “Inside Bill’s Head,” whom I won’t complain too much about for obvious reasons, but seriously my SEO department needs to be fired if he is coming up on search results ahead of the original and authentic Bill’s Head.

But there’s good news: whoever was squatting on “billshead.com” has given up, and now it’s mine and points right here to What’s in Bill’s Head. Go ahead: try it now. Type “billshead.com” into your address box and you’ll come right back here, like magic.

 

Q:

Will your output frequency improve now?

A:

Depends on your definition of “improve,” I suppose, but I doubt it.

 

Q:

Do you know why “Inside Bill’s Head” is beating out “What’s in Bill’s Head” in the search ranking?

A:

Because I searched on Google, and “Inside Bill’s Head” is hosted at Blogger, which is owned by Google. If you do the same search on Bing, “Inside Bill’s Head” doesn’t even show up, though “What’s in Bill’s Head” still doesn’t appear as high in the results as it should. Stupid Buffalo Bills always heading off to training camp and legislative bills always heading off for signature.

 Meta, Q&A  1 Response »  
 

Bill Answers Reader Mail

 Posted by Bill on May 11, 2010 at 1:37 pm
May 112010
 

Q: Why have you started posting again after all this time?

A: Work it out for yourself. You’re meant to be clever.

Q: Will it last?

A: Probably not.

Q: Twitter?

A: Yeah, I know. I still think it’s mostly stupid and over-hyped but I thought I’d give it another shot and see if I can make something useful of it.

Q: Will it last?

A: Probably not.

Q: Facebook?

A: Never.

Q: Do you actually have any readers?

A: Not as far as I know. FeedBurner says I have 42,387 subscribers, which would be impressive if I hadn’t just made up the first part of this sentence.

Q: You are inconsistent in your capitalization style for post titles.

A: That is a statement, not a question, but you are correct. This inconsistency was an uncharacteristically sloppy oversight and I should standardize things. But on the other hand, sometimes different styles seem appropriate for different kinds of post. Or maybe I am just too lazy to go fix them. If you’re into pointing out this sort of thing you might like OnlineStylebooks.com, despite its unimaginative name and rudimentary site design.

Q: You didn’t say things had to be in the form of a question. You’re just answering mail. It is you who are imposing the Q/A format on things.

A: Good point.

Q: What’s your favorite joke?

A: Most jokes just aren’t that funny to me. I like to think it’s because my sense of humour is more subtle and refined. Also most stand-up comedians just annoy me. Comic strips almost never seem funny to me. I do have a favorite joke, but it doesn’t work in print. Ask me the next time you see me. Oh, wait, here’s a good joke: Sarah Palin.

Q: Do you like pickles?

A: Not really. And I only recently made
the connection between dill pickles and dill the herb. But maybe you
hadn’t thought about that either. I think “Dill the Herb” would be a
good name for a band or a comic strip, but you’d have to pronounce the h.

Q: What if they were covered in chocolate?

A: Never tried it, but maybe. Most things taste good if you cover
them in chocolate. When I searched the aether for chocolate-covered
pickles just now the fifth result was this
page with some pointless videos of chocolate-covered pickles from
the Tulsa State Fair. I lived in Tulsa for six years in my youth. The
videos did not make me want to eat chocolate-covered pickles or go to
state fairs.

Q: You should sell t-shirts and coffee mugs and stuff with your pithy sayings and funny drawings. Sorry, I mean, “Why don’t you sell t-shirts and coffee mugs and stuff with your pithy sayings and funny
drawings.”

A: We decided that it doesn’t have to be in the form of a question, remember? Anyway, you’re thinking of someone else. I’m not that kind of clever.

 

Q: Oh, yeah. That’s a different guy. But don’t you have some catchphrases?

A: Not really. I like to say “It is a poor carpenter who blames his tools.” I’ve been saying it for years, and I always thought I got it from my dad. But recently I mentioned it to him and he had no idea what I was talking about. Either way, I didn’t invent it, and it’s not a t-shirt sort of thing. I’m also fond of “every day cannot be a feast of lanterns,” but again, not t-shirty.

A Dance to the Music of Time

Oooh. Pretty Books!

Q: Have you read Anthony Powell’s A Dance to the Music of Time?

A: Funny you should mention it. I read it (all four movements!) many years ago and quite enjoyed it. I was just the other day thinking I should read it again. You should go buy the complete set right now (be sure to use these four separate links so I get my Amazon kickback, because I could really use the extra 42 cents right now). Even if you don’t get around to reading them, the books will look quite nice on your bookcase.

Q: Anything else?

A: Not that I can think of. Here’s a funny YouTube video, apropos of nothing.

 Inbox, Q&A  No Responses »  
 

Bill Answers Reader Mail

 Posted by Bill on February 22, 2007 at 3:48 pm
Feb 222007
 

Q: Why haven’t you written anything in the past 6 months?

A: I haven’t had anything to say, or I haven’t felt like it, or I’ve been busy with other things. I’m prone to taking up and abandoning projects: get used to it.

 Inbox, Q&A  No Responses »  
 

D’oh! Behind already

 Posted by Bill on August 22, 2006 at 8:40 pm
Aug 222006
 

One or two of you have commented that the “word of the day” missed a few days. Please note that it’s “word of the day,” not “new word every day.”

Now, onward:

The interjection doh! (often spelt d’oh) will perhaps forever be associated with cartoon character Homer Simpson, who made it a part of American culture. Dan Castellaneta, the voice of Homer Simpson, explained the origin of the word in a 1998 interview in Daily Variety:

The D’oh came from character actor James Finlayson’s “Do-o-o-o” in Laurel & Hardy pictures. You can tell it was intended as a euphemism for “Damn.” I just speeded it up.

Dan Castellaneta may have invented the word independently, but in fact it had been around—and used the same way—for at least 40 years, appearing in print as early as 1945. The OED‘s definition is amusing:

Expressing frustration at the realization that things have turned out badly or not as planned, or that one has just said or done something foolish. Also (usu. mildly derogatory): implying that another person has said or done something foolish.

The similar duh dates from around the same time: a 1943 Merrie Melodies cartoon has the line

Duh… Well, he can’t outsmart me, ’cause I’m a moron.
 Language, Q&A, Word of the Day  No Responses »  
 
Words and images copyright by Bill except as noted otherwise. All rights reserved. Additional credits